Monday, January 22, 2007
9:05 PM
Have anybody ever wondered why sometimes we just feel this emptiness inside us? And when we try hard to not think about it, it just wouldn't go away... And i tot i was the only one, until michelle told me aloy was too.
Anyway, finally finished my NCAP course. 2 weekends of sufferings and its over, just hope so i'll pass. As usual, having the blues yesterday... I am always like this de, every sunday nite i will just go emotional and moody. I am just afraid to start school, afraid to face new beginnings. I dunno why, but the next morning, everything just cleared and i am back to my confident self. Sometimes i just feel that i have a split side of me, the emo me who is unconfident and the one everyone sees - confident bastard.
Today went to school as usual. Received a msg on the way from "sunwalk" ( WMO buyer ). haha, hope he can contact me soon so that i can sell all my WMO stuff to him so that i can wash my hands off it. Then had lessons as usual but the unusual thing was, i was sleepy since the start of the day. It is like so weird, i dunno why too. I slept quite okay last nite so there was no reason why i would feel so sleepy. But who knows, oh well... Dozed off during some lessons but managed to pull myself up to try and absorb whats given. After school i went to do something quite remarkable. I went to lot one with kh to get hui li & min li a small slice of b day cake and b day cards. Like omg la, i didn know i will do that for them, but i just did and i am happy with it. Many of u will be finding me crazy or what, what for going all the way to lot 1 and get those stuff and return to PJC to surprise them? Who are them to me? Well... they are my frens, i shld say. True frens that nva gave up on me and even lended me a helping hand when i was down. Tho i always dao-ed them and gave them blackface, they are really very nice to me. Min xian and michelle too. Thx guys, i hope u guys like the b day presents.
I have never knew that by making someone you are not so close with happy, u can too feel that sense of achievement. but i just did, and i will continue to do so bah... Frens like this are hard to get, frens like this will nva desert u, frens like this just touch me at times... Especially to hui li and min li, i hate to admit it but both of u touched me b4. really did. thx...
Nva really felt this sense of achievement for quite some time le, the last time i felt so was when i finished sewing the tigger pouch. But that sense of achievement was shortlived as it was not reciprocated... nvm.
Looking forward to a fun-filled week ahead, i hope? Devious plans coming up, WAHAHA... Other than studies, i finally find a meaning to this year's life. and that is to gain that sense of achievement by making ppl around me happy and happier with each thing i do. =)
Frens... anyone has a definition of that? tell me about it bah...
As you go through life you'll see There is so much that we Don't understand.
sun set or sun rise;
up to us to decide
